I left things off in the last episode unsure about where this podcast would go. I’ve now decided that this will be the last episode, at least for the foreseeable future. I’m still not exactly sure what I’m going to do instead to keep sharing the rituals with the world, but I’ll get into that a little later in this episode.
First, I have a lot of other things to catch you up on, including having received another letter from Edgar. This is what it said:
Adrienne, if you’re listening to this, I want you to know that I still love you. I want you to know that you don’t have to do this alone.
Okay, in case you couldn’t tell from that, Adrienne left.
In the days before she left, she spent many sleepless nights on the couch in the living room. When I would ask her what was wrong, she would just say that she was okay and turn away. No matter what I did or said, she seemed to tune me out. I could tell she wanted to deal with these things on her own, so I did my best to respect that.
She left about a week ago. It was during the night while I was asleep. When I woke up alone in the bedroom that morning, I thought I would find her sleeping on the couch as usual, but this time she was gone. All I found was a short note on the coffee table that said:
I suppose I should start by telling you about all the things that have happened that might affect the fate of humanity, but instead, I’m going to start by telling you about my relationship with Adrienne. I’m hesitant to share these details with you. It’s not my nature to want to talk about my personal life with strangers, much less the world, but I want to be transparent with you. I don’t know which parts of this journey are most important to share. Maybe it will be my personal story that will help you do more with the rituals in your life. At the very least, I want to be honest with you.
Even though Adrienne and I are soulmates, it doesn’t mean our relationship is some perfect fairytale. There is a fair amount of tension between us right now. I guess Edgar warned me about this. You would think that having the fate of the world on my shoulders would be my main concern, but I’m only human, and I’m easily distracted by emotions of the heart. My relationship with Adrienne weighs heavily on me right now.
The night she arrived at the safe house, Adrienne and I finally had some real time to ourselves. As we got to know each other that night, we both expressed feeling a strange connection between us. It felt like we had known each other for years, even though we had barely just met. I suppose it makes sense to feel this way about someone you have known across multiple lifetimes.
Adrienne told me about her childhood. She was an only child, raised by her father after her mom died when she was just seven years old. There was a year between when her mother was diagnosed with cancer and when she passed away. Adrienne said she remembers that year vividly, watching her mother progressively weaken and decline. She says it was during that year that she became all too familiar with death. Since then, she’s always felt like death is something she carries with her every day. It may be why she is more or less comfortable being an assassin.
It’s been almost two weeks since I first read Edgar’s last letter, where he said some powerful people might try to stop me. It turns out, he was right, and a lot has happened since my last episode. Honestly, I don’t think I’ve really processed it all, but to say the least, everything is going to be different moving forward. I suppose I’ll start at the beginning and tell you the story of the events as they unfolded.
As I mentioned in the last episode, I was a little spooked by Edgar’s comments suggesting I might be in danger. I didn’t know what kind of threat I needed to prepare for, or how I should go about trying to protect myself. I decided to just pack a bag with some supplies, clothes, and cash in case I needed to make a quick getaway.
I thought about staying in a hotel or going on an extended camping trip but settled on waiting until something actually happened before I made such a move. I didn’t know if I could really do anything to prepare myself if some of the most powerful people in the world wanted to do me harm. I thought maybe they would just hack my podcast and shut it down, but there was a chance of a direct threat as well, and it didn’t take long for that to happen.
When I released the first two episodes of this podcast last week, I had no idea what to expect. Thankfully, people are listening, and the number of listeners continues to grow each day. People are sharing this message with each other and word is getting out. That’s a long way from definitive proof that this is changing the world, but it’s a positive sign nonetheless.
In my own life, things haven’t been going so well. I live in a small town and work at a small hospital, where gossip travels fast. Rumors are spreading around work that I’m telling my patients crazy things, making me a liability to the organization.
My boss called me into her office a few days ago. She said, “Adam, I don’t know what we’re going to do with you. You’re causing quite a commotion around here. I’m getting a lot of pressure from both administration and the medical staff. We’re getting to the point where you’re going to have to choose between the podcast and your job.”
As I record this on Saturday, September 8th, I have not yet released the first episode. I had been waiting until I received a second letter from Edgar to confirm, at least to some extent, that I’m not going crazy. Well, last Sunday night, it happened. With the security cameras I set up, I captured a video of myself coming downstairs to write in my journal. It looked completely normal, like I was awake. I walked into the living room, picked up my journal from the coffee table, sat down on the couch, and began writing. No one would suspect that it was in fact, Edgar, my consciousness from my next life, who was doing the writing. I don’t think they would suspect it was the actions of a lunatic either.
But that hasn’t stopped others from thinking as much of me. Last weekend, before I received the second letter, I told my girlfriend, Emily, about the correspondence and the podcast. I handed her my journal so she could read Edgar’s first letter.
I don’t know about this. I feel like I’m walking toward a cliff. A voice inside me is saying, “Turn around,” while another voice is telling me to jump. It’s telling me to trust that something will brace me from the impact of the fall. But maybe I’m supposed to hit the ground hard. Maybe that’s my fate. Either way, my decision to start this podcast might change everything. It might change the course of my life, for better or worse. And this part might sound crazy, but this decision could also change the course of humanity. That’s my intention anyway.
You may not believe any of what I’m about to tell you. I honestly don’t know if I believe it. All I know is that everything changed last Sunday morning.
It started like any other morning: I woke up. I went downstairs. I walked into the kitchen to make myself some breakfast. And that’s where the normal part ended.
Dear Listener,
This is Steven Lalevich, creator of Awake the Future. Before you dive in, please be aware that this podcast is not intended to be a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis, or treatment. Always seek the advice of your physician or other qualified healthcare provider with any questions you have regarding a medical condition. Never disregard professional medical advice or delay in seeking it because of something you heard on this podcast. The use of the information contained within this podcast, as well as the materials on the website at awakethefuture.com, is at your own risk. Okay, that’s enough from me. I’ll hand things over to Adam now. Enjoy the show!
Sincerely,
Steven
